Enough to make me cry

and cry some more.

I cannot express to you all, how extremely disappointed and disgusted I am with people's behaviors. In fact, I'm down right embarrassed for them. Make no mistake, I don't consider myself an Angel...but there comes a point when enough is enough.

Family is something they say that never ends. BoyfriEND, girlfriEND, friEND--they all end but family doesn't. I'm beginning to think that it's kind of a myth. I never though I'd be one to write a family member off, but recent circumstances have had me thinking otherwise. I've been accused of having a short fuse, and I've done my best to harness it. For the most part, I've been able to deal with things and articulate what is bothering me in an adult fashion. I love my family, I really do. But sometimes I feel like I'm obligated to love them because they are family.

When people act a fool, it is always embarrassing. I hate watching people make a complete asshole out of themselves. There are people in this world that simply will not own up to any responsibility. For example, people who are miserable at the hands of themselves. Everyone hasn't had a perfect life. What's happened in the past, you can do nothing about. You can only control the present. How you deal with things, is entirely up to YOU. I can't have respect for someone who insists on blaming other people for how shitty their lives our. YOU are the one making it shitty. You are your own problem, and YOU are your own solution. On top of it, these "fine specimens" of perpetual toddlers turn into narcissistic bastards that have to have control over everything, and think the bane of their existence is to point out how fucked up everyone else is.  Everyone else of course knows and understands that actions like these, are only an attempt to try and turn the focus on someone else. Not only have I witnessed this in other areas of life, I've witnessed this in my own family. And of course no one can say anything to people that are like this, because as soon as you say it out loud and it becomes "reality", they tweak out and start a temper tantrum.

It hurts. What makes it even worse, is when you see your own flesh and blood act like this to your own kin. Fuck that shit. While everyone else sits idly and says nothing (because they've been conditioned to not want to deal with drama), I feel the need to speak up. Silence is not always the answer. When people act like this, they need to be called the fuck out. Half the reason why people act like this is because no one has ever stood up to them--telling them to calm their shit down. I can't stand it. It makes me feel absolute pity for them. They will die alone, with no real love in their lives. And it is no one's fault, but their own. I feel sorry for you. So sorry that it makes me cry when I think about the way they've behaved. 

Taking the route of less friction, is not always a good idea. In circumstances like these, I feel like someone needs to speak up and smack this fucker down. I am in no circumstance obligated to reach out to this person, for my own reasons. Not that they would care very much anyway. It's not okay to sit and judge other people, rag on family members in front of me, and talk shit about me behind my back. Fuck you and your miserable negativity. I don't want to be around someone like this, and I feel PITY FOR EVERYONE YOU COME IN CONTACT WITH. Must be difficult to be an actor all the time, I almost understand why you act the way you do. In this particular situation, distance is the key.

All I'm saying is, it's a shame. I don't understand why people can't just let things ride out. Our time on Earth is undetermined. Don't you want to make the best out of it? Why have such a horrible attitude? We come into the world alone, and we die alone. Why should ANYONE choose to BE ALONE while we still have the chance to not be lonely?